Sunday, February 26, 2012
HEARTBREAK, LOVE AND LIFE
Love is something many seek to find, but never really allow themselves the chance to find them. Each season millions of couples are blossomed while another million meet their demise!!!! I myself have been tthrusted back into the single world after a four year relationship. Many of my Milt-Fresh Experience followers got to see my relationship play out before your very eyes on this very blog. Looking back at those days I feel they were some of the bet. I look at the old pictures,blog posts and I wonder where did it all go wrong? How could you drive apart two people that were at once so tight. But as time goes on, individuals change. The needs that that an individual had 4 years ago, aren't the same needs you have in 2011-12. I asked myself many times is there anything I could have done differently to salvage the relationship? Initailly the only thing I would have changed would be my temper and my anger. I wouldn't have allowed myself to become so over whelmed by the situations that occured. However, when one feels like they've drawn the short end of the stick how do you react? One would say be more understanding. But in order to understand, one would have to be given the chance to understand. One would say become more of a giver? What happens when the receiver doesn't have time for the giver? Others would say communicate more. But what happens when communicaton turns into a war of words? The individual you've grown to love becomes a stranger befor your very eyes. What happens when a dozen red roses aren't enough to warm a heart? What happens when "I love you texts" mean nothing anymore? all of these and many more are what happened befor the end of the relationship. On a spiritual level I asked God why would this have to happen at a pivital point in my life. up until June of last year, 2011 was one of my best years. I life was finally coming together. My blog the Milt-Fresh Experience was taking off!!!! I ws introduced to the world of Internet radio with becoming co host of Vintagesoul Radio. I had people in the New Haven area believing in the Milt-Fresh brand!!! I tried my hand at owning my own business. Man it felt like good was answering every prayer I prayed. All except one, which was to keep me and my partner together. But like job,who am I to question what god does? But because of the things that were happening leading up to the end, I found myself falling into a depression. My enthusiasm for fashion blogging died. I allowed my business to go under. The only thing that was able to keep me going, was doing Vintagesoul Radio. Because of how I felt I became ungratful for the things god had blessed me with. Many would tell me "Milt theres no reason why you can't become a player again." Very true, however i've changed since my player days. In order to be a player, one has to have no fear of the word Karma!!!! For karma is what you will receive for playing with the emotions of females. But others would counter with " Well look what happened tp Milt-Fresh after being a gentleman." Also I say true. However, I feel it takes a special woman to enjoy the perks of being with a gentleman. Most independant women of 2012 feel like they're giving up their freedom by allowing a man to even open the door. In the end I take a lot away from this past experience at love. For one I take away that a person has to love you the same as you love them. At the same time you can't treat the individual like they're more your god and not your lover. Even though I go through bouts of denial. I feel the God used this break up as a wake up call. I feel he was telling me there is no body greater than him. The same way she came into your life, the quicker she can go. But God's love never abandons you. God's love always has time for you. God's love is always is there for you with open arms.